New Job as insurance benefits rep!

10:50 AM - Yooo it's been a long time but I'm posting again! I kinda just want to do some writing to clear my head after being sleepy and having a second cup of coffee after an hour nap on the couch and realizing I really need to get myself up and running so I can get this stuff done.

So I started working with an insurance company called AIL, the local branch here in Ohio is SSBH, and I've been working on getting into this job for a month now. Yeah. 

First, I had to get the state insurance license, and that course took me almost 2 weeks before I completed it and then signed up to take the exam as soon as I could. Luckily, I passed (only needed a 70%, and I got 77%, whew), and from there I also had some waiting to do before my orientation or training could start. Then, they gave me the script that everyone memorizes, and that's currently where I'm at in the process. I have my final script check on Monday at 9am, and I'm scared I won't get it done. I know I can do it, I just have to make myself do it because it's going to take hours of just plugging away at it.

So I'm getting over my self-conscious embarrassment of needing to read and repeat this stupid script (it's fine, it's just annoying to anybody who doesn't need to learn it) when Alex is home, I know he doesn't mind because he wants me to start this job just as much as I do, but I ask him to close the office door whenever I'm working on it just because it helps me a bit. So that's something I need to get over, because I literally have just today to work on it, and he's home today so it won't be the "I'm home while he's at work so I can be as focused and loud as I need to be without overthinking it." 

But I can do this.

I'm gonna start working on it here after I use the restroom (second cup of coffee is kicking in lol) and then maybe I'll update this post with how it went. If I don't pass my final script check on Monday, I will have to wait 3 weeks until Brandy's training is finished so that Sky can start training me at the beginning. Brandy's starting on Monday, so I need to be ready, too. oof -.-

Coffee in my veins

Hey it's been a while!!! 

These days, I've been home most of the time, but my goal is to start back up at work again this week. The reason I stayed home from work in the first place (I'm working with Shipt so it's up to me how much I work or don't work) was because I ran out of my meds and it took about 3 weeks to get all of them refilled. That long without them took a hard hit on my mental health. And it wasn't just my adderall that I ran out of, which would have just sent me back into sleep-all-day-without-energy-to-focus-on-work-or-anything, but it was my antidepressant too. I shoulda gotten back into the groove of things sooner than now, but that's in the past now and I'm just gonna focus on getting up tomorrow on Monday and getting my coffee, meds, breakfast, and being dressed for a day of shopping down in the part of town that gets more Shipt orders in the morning. I think that I'm going to also get something ready for Alex to eat for lunch so that I don't feel tied to coming back at that time so that I can cook him something. 

Lol, Lily is staring at her shadow on the carpet floor... 

Anywho, tomorrow's gonna be good. So during September I decided that I wanted to see how I would feel if I cut out coffee, so I started on October 1st so that I could track it as a month. I made it to the 14th and I was just so drained of everything I needed to do work, and I decided 2 weeks was enough to tell me all I needed to know. I need coffee. After that, I went back to the previous single cup in the morning, but then the past couple days I've been making French press coffee and having a second cup at lunch. I started using the French press because I ran out of normal coffee grounds :P And I've had the special grounds for the French press for a while now, they've just been sitting in my cupboard. And from everything I've seen after having more coffee during the day, it's a lot better, and I've had the motivation I needed to move around and clean the apartment and get things done. I CERTAINLY need to exercise. I've started to become more aware of that lately, and, well, I guess I've finally been able to separate the shame I associated with my general dislike of exercise and failure to meet the expectations of what I should have been able to do physically. My heart rate always skyrocketed whenever Mom would make me work out with her (which was mostly just walking! Speed walking, but still. Also if there was ever any incline, it was instantly a killer for me) and I never made aerobic exercise a routine or habit in order to try to fix this. 

Oh I see what Lily's been staring at!! It's a bug, probably a fruit fly from the bag of garbage I have sitting by the door for me to take out to the dumpster tomorrow...she's hunting it, haha. 

Well :) If anybody reads this, send me a text or an email and let me know how you are doing! I have so much stuff that I need to get better at, and keeping up with my good friends through the internet is one of those things. I just need to establish habits for all of it. Please pray for me, I really need to get these habits in place soon. In a year we might start having kids, and that'll be another thing to learn, so I need to have this stuff down so that it isn't another thing to add to the pile!

Love you all! Have a great week and a wonderful Thanksgiving. Maybe I'll write again before then, but just in case. :)

 

haiku: "artificial"

the days grow shorter
the nights bring the need for these
artificial lights
 

—ACB, Oct 21

I'm Bored at Work....what??

So I got this new job as a dishwasher, and they're not even always bringing dirty dishes. It's pretty slow so far today. I came in at 11, and it was so weird...
It's because it's a movie theater (I'm working in the kitchen, which this theater has because it's a Dine-In theater) and movies don't start showing until early afternoon... And it's an 11am-7pm shift... So yeah it's a weird feeling to be bored at work. Just needed to say that here.