~As I write today, I'm listening to the "Stranger Things" soundtrack (I found it here on YouTube). Thought you might want to listen along. 😊
First off, here's some definitions (Wikipedia):
"...a prewriting technique in which a person writes continuously for a set period of time without regard to spelling, grammar, or topic....Some writers use the technique to collect initial thoughts and ideas on a topic."
Freeblogging:
"A technique known as Freeblogging combines blogging with free-writing with the rules changed so that the writer does not stop typing for long periods of time."
Hey! So, what were those pictures I posted last time? I didn't give them any explanation, and the only captions were the years they were taken. Are they just random pictures? Actually, no—all of them held special significance for me, and, while I did want to convey what each picture meant to me, I ran out of time.
Today, I thought of freewrites. I used to do a whole lot of those back in high school, especially in my Creative Writing class. Good writing prompts are just too hard to pass up, and these pictures have to potential to make some really good journal entries. "A picture's worth a thousand words," and I have tens of thousands of words just burning a hole in my pocket. I've got to spend them before they're all blown away. And, who knows? Someday, I might polish these freewrites up, connect them with some narrative, and publish another book. :) Mom would like that, haha.
~For all freewriting-based blog posts, see the tag #Wells Of Thought: Notions and Expositions.
Here's prompt #1: 2013-A
 |
| 2013 |
As I sit and think about this photo, I can close my eyes and travel back in time to that very day.
When I flew with my family back to the States, we had a 4-hour layover in Tokyo, Japan, and I took a lot of photos there: pictures of some cha-cha's (off-brand M&M's) in my hand, held against the bright airport windows, showing the silhouettes of other passengers; some pictures of my suitcase, also taken artistically with my cheap camera; and just some goofy ones with my brothers.
In the picture there's a little bit of my personal item, the bag I used as a purse back then in 2013. I think I got that from my 14th or 15th birthday before we moved away from the town I'd lived in for 6 years. It was only 8 months after that move that we were on this trip. I remember pencils making holes in the lining of that purse and coming through the netting of the outer design, and I would always catch them when I heard the twing-twankle of the pencil falling on the tile floor behind me. I'm pretty sure I put my pencils in a pencil case before flying, so that I didn't lose any of my precious Ticonderoga brand pencils. I mean, we were coming back to the country where you could buy those at any store, but they were still valuable and I didn't want to lose them, haha.
This ticket was for the domestic flight from DFW up to Kansas City, where Dad and I were stopping to pick up a minivan that we were going to be borrowing for the year. I remember that, when we drove to pick it up at the person's house, we parked in the driveway, which cut through a hay field. I thought it was really pretty being out in nature, especially on a farm, as it reminded me of my grandparents' house back in Texas that my mom and brothers were getting to enjoy while I was on this extra trip. As it was the beginning of June, however, the pollen from that field just hit my dad like a brick wall the moment he opened the rental car door. His eyes teared up immediately, he started rubbing a red itchy nose, and his voice got hoarse and strained from his throat starting to constrict. That was pretty awful. We did the paperwork as quickly as we could and left with the new minivan, but Dad was still having an awful attack of allergies. We stopped at the first pharmacy we could find along the interstate on our way down to Texas.
The reason I went on that trip with my dad was that I wanted to stop in a town in northeastern TX to meet a boy. Yeah, he was my boyfriend, but the young-love relationship ended that next February, and I don't even think about the kid anymore.
(Am I at 1,000 words for this picture yet, or do I have to keep with this topic and talk about my ex from 10th grade? Nope...not even 500 words yet. Oh well, I guess it would be good for me to at least write a summary.)
We met online through a mutual friend. He was another MK, and he was also interested in writing, which was how we started talking. Looking back, I can only see how blind I was—I thought it was a selfless, mature relationship that we had started, but as it was my first actual relationship, I had only my good intentions and my optimism with which to form a bias. Later, I had negative experiences, trauma, and pessimism with which to judge my interactions with guys. That didn't do me any favors, either.
And nothing really changed until I decided this: that I was going to stop making swift judgments of a man's character that were based solely on my biased interpretation of his attitude, and that I would no longer use this judgment to sour my words and attentions toward him in an attempt to protect my heart. I was doing this both by shutting down any flirtations he might be thinking to show, and by putting to death any attention I might be tempted to give.
I was afraid of being loved and of loving, because both appeared to be one slip-up away from a web of self-pity, blame, and resentment that I would be stuck in for the next year.
But I changed. I called it my 'foreign policy', and I absolutely threw it out the window. That's no way to treat other guys!
Just because a guy comes off "cocky" the first time he meets the group doesn't mean that any confidence he exhibits is truly coming from a heart of self-centered arrogance.
Just because a guy appears "soft-spoken" and seems to avoid conflict doesn't mean that any kindness he shows you is truly a sign of a pedestal that he's put you on.
Just because a guy is good at guitar and gives off a "pastor's-kid" vibe doesn't mean that he's compensating for a troubled relationship with his heavenly Father by looking churchy.
People are complicated, and first impressions from strongly biased positions are often very wrong. I used to give everyone a chance, and to see the potential good news in every negative situation....And when I let one thing change that, it was hard to reverse some of its effects.
But as soon as I let go of those shields of defense, I could finally open my eyes to see people more clearly. And, of the couple of guys I met on the day I made that change, I saw the heart of one whose confidence was contagious, whose kindness was genuine, and whose faith was honest.
Alex is the one who encourages me, and he's the one God's used to push me closer every day toward the person I am meant to be.
—ACS, July 13th, 2018
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